Voir la version complète : Noukates
Ce Thread est dédié au noukates (blagues marocaines) :089:
Hada wahd ssbitar dial l vow, tayji andhom tbib mn simana l simana w jib lihom wra9 baydine w envelopes w ygoulihom ssiftou lwalidikom ssawlou fihom. koula wahad ach kaydir b dik lbriya.wahad essat chad lwar9a w darha f lenvelope. tbib gal hada dar labasse, ftah lbraya lga fiha lwr9a khawya w hawa ydor 3and lmssati galih malak mssift lwar9a khawyia, galih ma kandwich maa darna.
dhkal jaque chirak 3la bush o blair, gallihoum fach katddakrou??
gallih blair : kanwajdou lal7arb al3alamya III; gallih : o fine wsaltou?? gallih blair: rah attafa9na bach n9atlou 50 millions meslam o wahd alalmani !
gallih: 3lach achnou dar had alalmani ???
o houa ydour bush f blair gallih : chafti ach goult lik makayn lli ghadi yssawwal 3la 50 millions meslam
gallik hadda wahed dkhoul megloub tekka hda mertou ou gal lihha khaouar dak system lli derty f toillete!!!ghi kat 7al el bab kay ch3el eddo!
galt lih al7mar rak belti felfrigo!
C'est Abderrahman, un vrai marocain bien de chez nous, qui prend l'avion et se retrouve assis à côté d'un saoudien
Le Marocain s'adresse à son voisin :
salamo alaykom, coumment tu t'apelles?"
Le saoudien répond " ana ya akhi ismi Saad ibn khalifa, ibn abdallah, ibnou jawhar al qayss, ibn etc...
Au fil de cette longue et vertueuse généalogie, abderrahman est épaté, troublé et commence à se sentir intimidé Il se demande ce qu'il va bien pouvoir comment se présenter pour ne pas avoir l'air ridicule...
al khaliji demande à son tour à Abderrahman :
"et toi, ya akhi fillah !
et abderrahman se redresse sur son siège et dit fièrement:
"moi c'est abdarrahman arrahim maliki yawmi dinn, Iyaka naaboudou wa iyyaka nasta'ine
hada wahed lfaroge 3rad 3la wahed djaja fdarhoum, hat chrab ou lmakla ou dissire klaou hta klaou houma ysakrou ou msha lfaroge skhane lma oui kbou fl banio oui gouliha tkhshay ou hia tgolih 3lash oui gouliha malki bagha tna3si m3aya bhwayjek.......
galek hado wahad 3 3wazza khrej lihom wahad ejenn..galihom li gueltoha ndirha likom....nakez lewel(1)galeh brit nweli biade o bogousse,rado bogousse...ja (2) galih hta ana rodni biade o bogousse ,howa iroddo bogousse...ja (3) galih ota achno briti galeh rod had 2 li m3aya 3zawa bhali
WAHRANIA
01/12/2005, 16h18
Ce Thread est dédié au noukates (blagues marocaines) :089:
Hada wahd ssbitar dial l vow, tayji andhom tbib mn simana l simana w jib lihom wra9 baydine w envelopes w ygoulihom ssiftou lwalidikom ssawlou fihom. koula wahad ach kaydir b dik lbriya.wahad essat chad lwar9a w darha f lenvelope. tbib gal hada dar labasse, ftah lbraya lga fiha lwr9a khawya w hawa ydor 3and lmssati galih malak mssift lwar9a khawyia, galih ma kandwich maa darna.
très drole tes blagues khouya!!! surout celle la je l'aime bien!:096: :096:
hada wahade rajale dima tayakoul la3dasse bla maygoule bissmi lah, o dima taidire la3dasse, o wahed nhare yallah bgha yakoule ou howa igoulih chitane wa goule a sa7bi bissmi lah khalina nharbo, rak 9hartini b la3dasse
hada 1 l9isme tjem3o fih 3a lkoussala, ressamate lihom lmo3allima motallate ,w galet lihom chnahowa hada , o howa yhez lmakallekh fihom sob3o howa yqoule liha hadak 1dh harcha
fliflasoudania
01/12/2005, 21h48
ptdrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr :096: tbarkellah 3lik dotnet merci :096:
hada wahed rajel gal lweldo mni nkoun m3a nass aji wgouli ara 200 dh wmin yemchiw araha, dri masma3ch bah galo min yemchiw ldar araha, lmohim jaw l3ando nass ohowa yji weldo galo ba ara 200dh 3tahalo, dri mcha akhsrha bkat mnha 30 ryal ja flil galo bah ara 200dh, galo lweld ra khsrthaw baka mnha 30ryal howa ygoulo sir chri bihastylo hmar waji nmhi zabor mok mn lhala lmadania
hada wahad rajal 3ando camion haz fih 200 djaja, kan ghadi fi trik o l9a wahad lbant 3andha babghayo,darat lih auto-stop; gal liha tal3i nti hna 7daya o babghayou dirih m3a djaj lour, tamghadi fi trik o gal liha radi dabri 3lia galt lo "la"; gal liha "nazli fhalak"; tam ghadi fi trik o tla9a m3a les gendarmerie; galo lih "ach 3andak lour" gal lhom "3andi ghir 200 djaja" raj3o lawr 7assbo l9aw 180; o howa igol lhom ra wa9ila ghir ghlat; tam ghadi tla9a m3a gendarmeries khrayn galo lo ach 3andak lour gal lhom ghir 180 djaja raj3o 7assbo l9aw ghir 160; rajal chak o ghir fat gendarmeries o w9af mali rja3 ichof l9a babghayou galass 7da lbab ki waggaf djaja o kigol liha "dabri 3lia" gat gol lo "la" kigol liha " nazli f7alak"
fi sbitar lhoumak tbib 3ta lkola wahad tomobila, lmohim koulwahad achnou dar biha .wahad hayad liha rouwaid ,tbib chak fih gal hada wakila rja3 lih 3aklou ,galih ach kadir ,ja lahmak galih kan3alamha tehbou
Wahad khayna mkhasem m3a martou,makihadrouch m3a ba3diyathom,wahad nhar bra yfik m3a 7sbah,mlli bra yn3as kteb liha fwerka :
faykini m3a 7 sbah redda,lred lih mafak htal 12,ja ychouf lka hdah warka mktoub fiha:nouuud ra 7 hadi !!!
gallik hada ga3 dowal diyal l3alam ttaf9ou bache ysan3ou saroukhe,wkoulla dawla khasha tjib chi haja bache ysan3ou had saroukhe. safi hiya hadik koulla dawla sahmate wsan3ou had sarouke walakine lmaghrib bouhdou ba9i masaham bwalou,galssou kitsannaw lmoumattile dial lmaghrib bache ghadi ysaham.whouwa yji lmoumattile diyal lmaghrib haz wahad chanta wkoulchi kitsannata bache ghadi ysaham lmaghrib wsaroukhe safi kmal,hal hadak lmoumattil chanta diyal whowa yajbad wahad tikita wllassa9ha 3la sakhoukhe:MADE IN MOROCCO
wa7ed lbante foumha khaneze bazaf wa7ed nhare jawha lkhattabbe ou gallette liha mha mnine ykounou lkhattabbe mathadriche bache mayharbouche ou gallette liha wakha ou dazette lkhoutoubba maziene wahed nhare galle liha khatibha khourji m3aya ou mchate m3ahe galsou fi resterans ougale liha chnou tcharbi gallete lih elli kane houwa ygoul liha flanna wache hza9ti gallete lih la houa ygoule liha ou da ba khritti
galek hada wahed n'har , wahed echefar doukhl 3la wahed lmra ou rajelha na3ssine jbad el mouss ou nawed lemra bgha i bdah'ha souwelha ki ssmiyetek? gatlou Fatna galha ma nedbhakch hit el walida smiytha Fatna ou mach 3and rajelha galou kii ssmiytek? galou smiyti Mohamed bassah mara mara y3eytouli Fatna
Galek hada wahed ja 3and khouh l franca, iwa mnin kayemchi le kahwa kayji le serveur ou kay goulou : "Monsieur, vous désirez ?". Houa ki commandi : "Coca", hedchi ma 3raf...
Min be3d, coca tal3et lou fi rassou. Mcha 3and khouh, galou : "3iet b coca, zouatni, kiffech ki goulou "kahwa". Ou khouh galou : "1 café".
Fi sbah, mcha l kajwa, ja le serveur : "Monsieur, vous désirez ?". Ou houa farhen, jaweb " 1 café". Le serveur galou " Long, court, capuccino, mocca, noisette"... Ou houa y goulou : "Coca"...
wahd alfar makhllawhch idkhoul lalbar, ja 3andou sba3 gallih ghir yallah dkhoul m3aya . lmouhim dkhal m3ah. gallih sba3 chi wiskia alfar??
gallou : iyeh allah yahafdak!
chrabha gallou nzidk chi wiskia okhra alfar ??
galou : iyeh allah yahafdak.
chrabha o houa yskhoun. gallou sba3 : nzidk chi wiskia alfar???
gallou lfar: mazal tgoul lfar nkhassar lamok wajhak
wa7ed lbante foumha khaneze bazaf wa7ed nhare jawha lkhattabbe ou gallette liha mha mnine ykounou lkhattabbe mathadriche bache mayharbouche ou gallette liha wakha ou dazette lkhoutoubba maziene wahed nhare galle liha khatibha khourji m3aya ou mchate m3ahe galsou fi resterans ougale liha chnou tcharbi gallete lih elli kane houwa ygoul liha flanna wache hza9ti gallete lih la houa ygoule liha ou da ba khritti
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa xpdrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr :096: :096: mdrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr wa lmouuuuuuuuuuuuuuut dial looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool
Redalinho
06/12/2005, 01h29
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa lmoutttt diaaaaaaal dehk kikh kikh lol
wahd alfar makhllawhch idkhoul lalbar, ja 3andou sba3 gallih ghir yallah dkhoul m3aya . lmouhim dkhal m3ah. gallih sba3 chi wiskia alfar??
gallou : iyeh allah yahafdak!
chrabha gallou nzidk chi wiskia okhra alfar ??
galou : iyeh allah yahafdak.
chrabha o houa yskhoun. gallou sba3 : nzidk chi wiskia alfar???
gallou lfar: mazal tgoul lfar nkhassar lamok wajhak
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa looooooooooooooooooooooool:096:
Redalinho
06/12/2005, 01h29
bonnnnnne nuit chniwlaaaa ;);)à;)
bonnnnnne nuit chniwlaaaa ;);)à;)
douce nuit redalinho :)
Redalinho
06/12/2005, 01h31
krakh kérkllakh :096:
pchakh perpelakh:bootyshak
pchakh perpelakh:bootyshak
ach douk lmsistate?:drunk:
koune t7chém :089:
http://img209.imageshack.us/img209/7688/tbe35tn.jpg
gallik hada wa7ed le mari berkani gal l'mrato berkanya : fach nji men lkhedma wejdi rassek ghan t3echaw berra, fellil fach rja3 le mari, l9a mratou mwejda tebla fezzen9a prete pour le3cha
wah tbib kay9allab wahd assayad men lour, tbib : noud ma3andak walou !
lamrid: kifach ma3andi walou wana addarssa 9atlani ??
tbib : 3lach nta bik addarssa?? dentiste rah fl'etage lfou9 , ana rah tbib dial labbassar ;;.. o dikssa3a fach chaftini kan9allab lik llour goul lia rah ana bia ddarssa ??, lamrid: yass7ab lia ghadi tajbadha men jdar
wahd almou3allim dair addarss 3la "al3azima", wahd tilmid gallo : ostad mafhamtch chnou hia 'al3azima' ?
gallou almou3allim : ghadi na3tik mital: almosslimine falghazwa dial badr kanou 300 , o alkouffar kanou 1000, o bel3azima 9adrou lamssalmine yghalbou lkouffar wakha houma 9lal; wach fhamti??
gallou tilmid lla mazal!
gallo ok : ghadi na3tik mital akhour simple: alwidad la3ba m3a arraja, al7akam trad 3 alla3aba men raja ; ; b9aw la3bine ghir b 8 o bel3azima ghalbou ,, wach fhamti daba?
gallo tilmid: ih fhamt! gallou almo3allim: achnou fhamti?
gallou tilmid: arraja ghadia tla9a m3a lamssalmine flafinale
wah tbib kay9allab wahd assayad men lour, tbib : noud ma3andak walou !
lamrid: kifach ma3andi walou wana addarssa 9atlani ??
tbib : 3lach nta bik addarssa?? dentiste rah fl'etage lfou9 , ana rah tbib dial labbassar ;;.. o dikssa3a fach chaftini kan9allab lik llour goul lia rah ana bia ddarssa ??, lamrid: yass7ab lia ghadi tajbadha men jdar
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool:clap: continue dotnet c'est excellent
fliflasoudania
07/12/2005, 22h26
wah tbib kay9allab wahd assayad men lour, tbib : noud ma3andak walou !
lamrid: kifach ma3andi walou wana addarssa 9atlani ??
tbib : 3lach nta bik addarssa?? dentiste rah fl'etage lfou9 , ana rah tbib dial labbassar ;;.. o dikssa3a fach chaftini kan9allab lik llour goul lia rah ana bia ddarssa ??, lamrid: yass7ab lia ghadi tajbadha men jdar
ptdrrrrrrrrrrrrr wa LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL hadi zwina wa lollllllllllllllllllllllllllll :clap: :biggthump
galak wahad lbarkani kan f s3idiya y3oum iwa bka zayed zayed o mitnageur bka ygolo aaaa fin zayed o howa galo f barkan.
galak hadou wa7ad 3 dial drari galssin kayt7achchou ou m9abla m3ahoum wa7ad lmraya ou houwa ydour wa7ad 3and sa7bou ou houwa ygoul lih chouf a sa7bi wa7din mgablin m3ana 7ta houma kayt7achchou ou houwa ygoul lih wayih b7alna .
chwiya ou houwa ysali lihoum lou9id ou houwa ydour wa7ed 3and lakhour ou gal lih sir a sa7bi 3and wa7ed men hadou li m9ablin m3ana khoud men 3andhoum lou9id .
ou houwa ynoud 3andhoum ou houwa ygoul lih sa7bou safi rja3 rja3 hahouwa jay.
ptdrrrrrrrrrrrrr wa LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL hadi zwina wa lollllllllllllllllllllllllllll :clap: :biggthump
flifla malki m3a dak l'emoticone lli kaysff9 :096:
flifla malki m3a dak l'emoticone lli kaysff9 :096:
raha kheddama m3a dqayqia!
debri liha 3la chi skhanji:089:
raha kheddama m3a dqayqia!
debri liha 3la chi skhanji:089:
makhassehach chi t3arji:089: ?:096:
Andalussian
08/12/2005, 00h28
makhassehach chi t3arji:089: ?:096:
hana jebtelha l'groupe koullou :D
http://www.tropix.co.uk/region_files/morocco_3/MOR03TX2,17.jpg
fliflasoudania
08/12/2005, 14h50
hana jebtelha l'groupe koullou
http://www.tropix.co.uk/region_files/morocco_3/MOR03TX2,17.jpg
ptdrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr daba ghadi nbda nkhdem...
yallah chkoun lli 3endou chi 3erss? chi 7efla? chi sbou3? chi moussem?
:clap: :clap: :clap:
hada wahad mcha m3a mrato l restaurant et demanda djaja, jabhalo lgarson ohowa yahshila sba3 oythouk gal lgarson hadi djaja fassia, jibli wahda okhra, jablo wahda nafs lmoshkil o gallo hadi oujdia gallo jibli wahda okhra, kan wahed sakraan galess kayshouf o ja l3ndo o habbat sarwalo ogallo llah ykhallik goulli fin naskon ana ma3kaltsh aladress
hada farid 9bal ma ymout wssa mrattou bach ma tkhounouch bzzaf ila khantou mrra ghadi ydour f la9bar doura mat si farid ou dazzet al ayam ou mattet htta mrattou jatt tatsaouel 3lih chkoun chaf farid galiha wahed wach ka tsewli 3la farid al farfara
wa7ed sata sakrat raj3a fi lil jatha tayara o tabwi3a waslat 7da l3imara fin ka taskoun o ta9yat fi tarro daha n3ass hokkak mkawza chafha wa7ed skayri hokkak tla3 foug manha chwiya matt sata talat men charjam chaft skayri khaddam galt lih a wlidi ach ka dir gal liha ach ka ndir hadi ba99a zwina o lo7toha fi tarro
sawlou wahd almirikani o wahd lafrançawi o wahd almaghribi :
ila l9iti matalan chi mra f 2.00 dial llil o kaina achta o lbard o hia 3ariana achnou ghadi tdir? -miricani: ghadi na3tiha lmonteau diali o nrakkabha ftaxi.
-françawi : ghadi na3tiha lmonteau diali o nwassalha ldarha.
darou 3and almaghribi l9awh kaygoul ldialou wa ghir matalan wa ghir matalan
asssi dotnet ma3andi mantssalek wa nkitate hadou :corkysm21
ghadi nssahem m3akoum
hada a sidi galek wahed lkissam ja l oustad kaysewelhoum
oustade : aji nta bak fach khedam ??
tilmide 1 : , kheddar
oustade: khizouwa za2id khizouwa
tilmide 1 : jouj khizouwat a mou3alimi
oustad: meziane ,noud nta bak fach khedam??
tilmide2 : aaaa kessal
oustade : sabouna za2id sabouna
tilmide2: jouj sabounate a mou3alimi
oustade: meziane adak lkhamej lkassoul bak fach khedam
lkassoul: chnawa ba guezzar
oustade: fkhad za2id fkhad
lkassoul :terma a mou3alimi:bootyshak
nzidek wahed noukta oukhra a ba dotnet
AVERTISSEMENT
noukta que vous allez lire contient des trucs dial zenka ame sensible s'abstenir
ana 3lemtkoum:corkysm21
hada wahed khayna nag 3la waheed khayti dima tabe3ha pssst psst zine wa gouli lia ach kayne f dak l killotte dima dima mssede3liha rassha
wahed nhar lbent mchat 3and amha katgoul liha wa mama wa had khayna sada3ni dima galess 3lia ach kayne taht lkilotte gat lih wahad lmerra la sewlek gouli lih mejmer
hya hadik mchat satta houwa iji satt psst psstt a dik lkatkouta ach kayne taht lkillotee
gat lih mejmer
gal liha wa hak wahed loukbala chwiha:corkysm21 :rofl:
fliflasoudania
18/12/2005, 16h35
nzidek wahed noukta oukhra a ba dotnet
AVERTISSEMENT
noukta que vous allez lire contient des trucs dial zenka ame sensible s'abstenir
ana 3lemtkoum:corkysm21
hada wahed khayna nag 3la waheed khayti dima tabe3ha pssst psst zine wa gouli lia ach kayne f dak l killotte dima dima mssede3liha rassha
wahed nhar lbent mchat 3and amha katgoul liha wa mama wa had khayna sada3ni dima galess 3lia ach kayne taht lkilotte gat lih wahad lmerra la sewlek gouli lih mejmer
hya hadik mchat satta houwa iji satt psst psstt a dik lkatkouta ach kayne taht lkillotee
gat lih mejmer
gal liha wa hak wahed loukbala chwiha::
ptdrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr zwina 3endek hadi wa looooooooooooollllllllllllllll :clap: :clap: :jumping38
ptdrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr zwina 3endek hadi wa looooooooooooollllllllllllllll :clap: :clap: :jumping38
afffiiiiineeeeee alacanadyiiaa
il fait fraite en ostie tabarnak :096:
fliflasoudania
18/12/2005, 17h14
afffiiiiineeeeee alacanadyiiaa
il fait fraite en ostie tabarnak :096:
ahhhhh wé loollllll chui po sortie aujourd'hui :096:
ach khbarek??
ahhhhh wé loollllll chui po sortie aujourd'hui :096:
ach khbarek??
souloukattt m3a had lberd lmoufzi3
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